Are You Ready for a Serious Relationship? The Truth You Need to Hear

From episode: California Trusted Psychic Advisor Christine Wallace Sneak Peak To My Online Course

do we need to be within ourselves before we start putting ourselves out there on the market of being in a serious relationship with someone? Well, one of the things that a lot of people make a mistake with is the, it's going to take one to forget one. Okay, nothing could be further from the truth. Taking, getting involved with someone to forget about your ex is such a bad idea because it actually ends up making you feel so much worse because you're not healed, you're not recovered, you're bringing in a lot of baggage from that past relationship. So even if the one in front of you might be Mr. Right, you're still so caught up in the past that you're not going to be able to see the good qualities in this person that you're meeting up with. All you're thinking about is, you know, comparing this new person to your ex all the time and you can't appreciate what is special about this new person because your true desire is to be with the ex. That's if you are not the one that did the breaking up. So, I mean, maybe even you had good reasons to break up with the person, but jumping into another relationship before you're really open, honestly open to being with someone new, that, that is definitely not the thing to do. And in over 30 years of working and helping people in romantic relationships and trying to help them reunite with their soulmate or whatever the case may be, I have never found that to be a good idea. So that's one issue. The other issue is what are you feeling about yourself? Are you feeling lots of self -doubt? Are you feeling not good enough? Do you still have negative intrusive thoughts about your past, whether it be because of past relationships or even your deeper past and childhood and unresolved conflict with your family members or whatever the case may be. So if you're going through a lot of that, you are definitely not healed enough to have a good, positive, fulfilling relationship. Many of us that have had a, had a lot of struggle in their childhood and trying to prove their worth to neglectful parents, try to do the same thing in a romantic relationship and hope that our partner can help to fill the void, but that's not going to happen because this is not a parent. Okay. So if that is something that you think upon self -examination that you might be struggling with, then you need to address that first because there's, there's no one that's going to make up that difference. You have to appreciate this new person as a partner and not set a standard of your expectations of what a parent should be doing, like giving that special attention or, or all of that stuff, because this person is supposed to be your equal